Montana women might be the most practical and witty on the planet. Want to know how to impress a woman from Montana on Valentine's Day? Here's a list of the best gifts that they actually want, from their lips to our ears. And it's hilarious.

Valentine's Day is tricky. It's a big deal to some, and just another day to many. Even those who don't have a significant other can celebrate by making their best friend their valentine. It feels good to do something nice for someone you love, or give them a gift you know they'll genuinely like. The key there is - SOMETHING THEY'LL GENUINELY LIKE.

If you're planning on getting a gift for a Montana woman, would you rather spend money on an expensive card, roses that will last a week, and bath bombs she doesn't have time to use - OR - give her something that is meaningful, helpful, and often times free?

That brings us to Montana women. We asked what they would REALLY like for Valentine's Day and the answers were diverse, off the wall, completely random, often free, and generally hilarious. Let this be a lesson in 'keeping it simple' and 'money can't buy you happiness'. This is what we asked: "What do you actually want for Valentine's Day?"

  • "I'd really like one full month of not dealing with the cat box. Nobody deals with it but me. No poop. No smell. No buying the damn litter. One month. That's it."
  • "Cash. Cash with no questions."
  • "What do I want? I want to watch the Super Bowl halftime show completely uninterrupted. No chatter, non questions, no tasks, just let me watch the whole thing even if it sucks."
  • "My husband is a plumber but the kitchen sink has been dripping for 3 months. I'd like the g--damned sink fixed."
  • "I'd like first right of refusal for the next couple of powder days. Somebody has to stay home with the kid and it's definitely my turn to get some turns."
  • "I swear to God if I get another charm for the charm bracelet I never wear or asked for, we're getting a divorce."
  • "All expense paid girl's weekend to someplace warm. I want time with my friends desperately."
Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on Unsplash
Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on Unsplash
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  • "Wine of the Month Club. Couple of clicks and it's happiness for a year. How hard is that?"
  • "For once, no whiskers in the bathroom sink would be a lovely gift."
  • "I'd like my husband to be the designated driver for the next several major holidays. I'm ALWAYS the DD and I'm over it."
  • "He can take the kid to swim lessons and sit there bored, listening to screaming kids and chlorine soaked muggy air."
  • "My boyfriend doesn't shave in the winter and I hate it. I want him to shave his beard."
  • "My car is disgusting because of OUR children. It would be cool if he'd wipe up the dried yogurt for once."
  • "I'd like him to replace all my weed that he's smoked."
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Photo by Elevate on Unsplash
Photo by Elevate on Unsplash
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